Monday 25 July 2011

Three Irishmen at lunch

There were these three Irishmen, Paddy, Mick and Seamus. They were digging a large hole in the High Street and had been working all morning, when lunchtime arrived. As usual Mick and Seamus had brought their own sandwiches with them and commented how dull lunch was when they were working on site.

Paddy then proceeded to surprise them both, by announcing that his wife had a made a lovely steak pie for them all and that all they needed to do was heat it up. Mick and Seamus were delighted and Mick quickly volunteered to warm the steak pie using the fire barrel which they normally used for burning asphalt.

In no time at all, the dish was piping hot and Mick picked it up. As he wasn’t wearing any gloves and the dish was red hot, he dropped it quickly, breaking the dish and spilling the contents.

Seamus was disappointed that there wouldn’t be a hot meal for lunch after all, but Paddy was furious that his wife’s dish had been broken. “You’ll have to get my wife a new dish now”, he shouted to Mick.

Mick said, “Where I am supposed to get a new one?”

Paddy replied, “There’s a shop along the High Street that sells everything.... you’ll get one there”.

Mick said, “What type of dish is it?” Paddy replied, “It’s a Pyrex”.

So Mick heads off to this shop and as he had a bad memory he kept saying the name so as he wouldn’t forget….. “Pyrex, Pyrex, Pyrex, Pyrex”, he kept repeating. Then suddenly an elderly lady came up to him and asked him where the number 17 bus stop was. Mick explained to her that if she went to the end of the road and turned right, it was just around the corner. The elderly lady thanked Mick for his help and walked off down the road to the bus stop.

After this distraction, Mick had now forgotten the name of the dish. He stood thinking for a couple of minutes and then he thought, “I know, it was Durex!”

He then continued to walk down the road and kept repeating, “Durex, Durex, Durex, Durex”. Finally he arrived at the shop that sells everything and approached the counter, where a stunning young lady assistant asked if she could help him.

Mick asked, “Can I have a Durex please?”

The assistant replied, “What size would you like?”

Mick said, “You had better make it a big one, as there are three of us working on the same hole!”

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