Thursday 20 August 2015

Lance corporals

Two old boys, Mick & Paddy, have been promoted from Privates to Lance corporals.

Not long afterward, they’re out for a walk and Mick says, “Hey, Paddy, there’s the NCO Club; let’s you and me step in.”

“But we’re only privates”, protests Paddy.

“We’re Lance corporals now”, says Mick, pointing to his stripe and pulling him inside. “Now, Paddy, I’m a-gonna sit down and have me a drink.”

“But we’re privates”, says Paddy.

“You blind, boy?” asks Mick, pointing again at his stripe. “We’re Lance corporals!”

So they have their drink, and pretty soon a one of the Army lasses comes up to Mick. “You’re cute”, she says, “and I’d like to date you, but I’ve got a bad case of gonorrhoea.”

Mick pulls his friend to the side and whispers, “Paddy, go look in the dictionary and see what gonorrhoea means. If it’s okay, give me the okay sign.”

So Paddy goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Mick the big thumbs up.

Three weeks later Mick is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible case of gonorrhoea. Mick says to Paddy, “Why the hell did you give me the thumbs up?”

“Well Mick, in the dictionary, it say gonorrhoea affects only the privates.” Pointing to his stripe, he says… “and we’re Lance corporals!”

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